Scarf #1

Scarf #1

Baby Wool.  Soft. Secure.  When I put the wool in my mom's hands. Give her the needles.  She instictively holds the needles and wraps the wool around her fingers like she always did.  I wish I was the wool.  I wish she knew me like she knows it.  Recognized me like she recognizes it.

Were we able to go back in time to talk about what this looks like today and to be able to ask her what to do. 

January 23 2007 at 12:30pm my mom had her first Doctor's appointment where the focus was on the possibility of Dementia.  We had 'known' for more than 4 years that this day would come.  She sat with my dad and I and answered questions from Dr. G..  all the while differing to us, glancing at us.. hoping that we could answer for her.  At the end of the hour he informed her (and us) that his diagnosis was "mild Alzheimer's Disease".  Bad.

Tears, yelling, she actually pulled some of her hair out.  As we drove home my dad asked me to stop so he could pick something up.  My mom and I sat in the car and cried.  Her biggest concerns?  #1 -"What will happen to your father? who will look after him?" and #2 - "I saw my mother go through this and I know how awful it is".  That day I made a promise to my mother.  I will look after dad. 

The next morning.  Dr. G had written "mild Alzheimer's Disease" on a piece of paper and had given it to mom.  She looked at that piece of paper that she had left on the table and said "Mild Alzheimer's Disease?  What's that about?"  no worries!  The piece of paper dissappeared and we didn't mention it again. 

If you were born in the 30's... if you don't acknowledge something.... it DOESN'T EXIST!